The trail to my d day

So the weeks passed and I kept my eye on the prize…it was like I was in special ops training for a reconnaissance mission. I would leave no stone unturned. At this point, Music Man had turned in his work cell phone and was able to use his personal phone for work. I hacked into his iCloud, lied about his age and put a teen monitoring app on his phone. Highly illegal, yes, but I was betting he wouldn’t press charges. I monitored every move he made on that phone for 3 years. Nada…ugh this was killing me. He wasn’t even lying about his whereabouts anymore. I put gps in his car, I pulled all our old phone records and looked up hundreds of phone numbers. I even pulled his credit report! I was truly crazy and focused. Oh I also have to add that my doctor had recently prescribed me Vyvanse for ADD. Maybe that was part of it, but I have never been so focused in my life!

We were still in marriage counseling off and on, he had recently began taking an antidepressant to combat work stress which chilled him out a lot. But he still threw out those zingers regarding the fact that Im the one who got caught etc etc. He gloated and I kept snooping. It was a vicious cycle. I remember one conversation in particular where I told him I was afraid he was just like his sister (she was a sex addict and married and basically everything he was, but we both knew about her). He listened attentively, shook his head and said “that’s fair, I understand why your afraid of that.” and that was all, he walked out of the room. He was so calm, I didn’t even think it was an odd reaction at the time.

One day while I was on my computer, I received a notification that my timeline was ready to review. That was very confusing because I knew nothing about google maps timeline. I clicked on it and saw every move someone was making for a year, but it was in a town where my best friend lived. It turns out she had logged onto my phone once to check her email and google tracked her whereabouts for a year! We had a good laugh about it, but man, what a lightbulb moment that was for me!

It was August 2017, my oldest daughter had just left for her second year of college and her sister and brother were there helping her move. Music man and I were home alone when I logged on to his google account. I looked at his timeline and good lord!! Google tracked every one of all his locations and all his google searches for 2 years. From 2012 till around June of 2014. I just sat there dumbfounded while he was in a chair across from me watching tv. It was escorts, hookers, massage parlors, craigslist ads. It was in the city we lived in and every city he traveled. My heart broke into a thousand pieces and I said I was going to go run an errand. I drove off, pulled over and cried for an hour. I felt like barfing. I NEVER EVER would have thought this was the way he cheated. I figured a client or two or three, but dear god I abhorred the sex trade industry. I felt as though we were so above that. I always saw men who paid for sex as the scum of this earth. As rapist. But here it was smack in my face. The monster I was married to. It’s like god got tired of all my wasted research and threw it in my lap as if to say “here you go, be careful what you ask for” On top of this, a historical giant hurricane was on its way to our city and there was no place else to go but home.

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